Hockey Now Blog

BY / JOHN CULLEN
Hockey Now Blogger


Just over a year ago, we lost our friend Jill. Well, we lost her in body, though we certainly didn't lose her in spirit. And we never will. She was absolutely, without question, the biggest Canucks fan I have ever known. Personal highlights for her included a trip down to Anaheim to watch the Canucks play the Ducks(pictured above), and meeting Trevor Linden after the Canucks game he treated her to(which she got to watch from the press box). She was a massive hockey fan, too. Spent virtually the entire 2.5 weeks of the Olympics downtown, supporting Canada in their run to the gold. Traveled long distances to see a good friend of hers play junior hockey, and embarrassed the hell out of him with signs, screaming, and general insanity(you know how teenage girls are) in the stands.

She also had cancer. Four times. By age 20. It finally took her life last September after a battle that I have trouble defining as a "battle" because she was the type of person who never made it about her. Make no mistake, she gave it one hell of a fight(she beat it three times!), but it was never "Jill vs. Cancer". It was "I am Jill. I'm a person, not a disease, and I refuse to let this define me." And it never did. She was full of life, she took advantage of every day that she got to live on this planet, and set an example for me and a hell of a lot of other people, too. Those are all clichés, but you know what? Sometimes, clichés are true, and Jill never tired of doing what she loved.

Her jersey? Old-school Linden. Girl knew what was up.

I met Jill when I was 14 and she was 9, just about to be diagnosed with leukemia for the second time. I had befriended her brother Ryan at school(now my best friend of 10+ years), and we immediately bonded because, well, she loved her hockey. You're never quite sure how much a 9 year-old girl knows about hockey and when she first started to take me to task, I shook her off. That was a pretty big mistake. I had the privilege of attending a few games with her over the years, and she was one dedicated little Canucks fan. She could talk circles around anyone about Canucks stats, her favorite players, every team in the NHL, and she never missed a game. When we were all incredulous that the Canucks games were on pay-per-view and we had to start paying for them, she was too busy to care because she was thinking up schemes to get her parents to pay for them. And they paid for every single one of them. I know this because I was there, watching them right along with her.

I'm writing this because, as a blogger and a member of a larger hockey blogging community, I think we get too down about the game sometimes. Sometimes we get so wrapped up in it, we forget that it's a game, being played for our entertainment and our enjoyment, and we let it rule our lives far more than we should. Jill understood that hockey was something to have a passion for, something to love, and I will forever miss the back-and-forth we had over everything the game had to offer. She was someone who appreciated the little things about hockey like I did: the smell of the rink before and after a game. The personalities of the players, the best and most humble athletes in sports. A good goal, no matter who it was scored by. At the end of the day, we're all just hockey fans, and whenever I get my head buried a little too deep in an article or I get a little too upset at a game, I think about Jill, about the smile on her face after Canucks wins, the gleam in her eye when she described meeting Trevor Linden("HE WAS SO HOT! And nice. BUT ALSO SO HOT!"), and I know more than anyone, she would have adored the Canucks' recent Stanley Cup run--even if they lost. So take a step back, and take a moment to realize that we're lucky to be fans of the greatest game in the world, and appreciate it by playing it, watching it, and if you're so inclined, blogging about it. Because it really is the best.

I'm also writing this because Jill was an extremely avid fighter against cancer as a disease, and she was the type who would do anything to raise money for the cause. She'd walk, bike, climb, sprint, sing songs, visit kids, give talks, do anything to raise awareness of the cause. And I'm doing the same.

I'm trying to stretch it out. It's not working.

When Movember first began to gain traction as a trend, I thought it was kind of stupid, though I think I was mostly just jealous of those who could grow way better 'staches than I could. Then I realized that I was in fact the stupid one, and it has nothing to do with me, or you, but the greater good. When you have someone to fight for, it makes it even more worth it, and I truly appreciate everyone who "donates their face" at this time of year.

Though I recognize Movember raises money for prostate cancer awareness, I know Jill would be proud of me all the same. Actually, she'd probably be horrified at the state of my lip sweater, but she'd appreciate the gesture, even if it scared her(and babies). So if you haven't donated, please take some time and visit my Movember page over at http://mobro.co/jojoco and donate to the cause. I just set the page up a couple days ago due to the previous horrid quality(see: lack of visibility) of my stache, so my donations are looking pretty shabby. I NEED YOUR HELP! And you can help a whole lot of others in the process. I'm going to be auctioning off Canucks tickets at my school to help the cause, as well as host a stand-up comedy night in the new year in support of Jill. Everyone has been affected by cancer in some way, and there's never been a better time than now to step up.



Thank you all so much for reading and supporting me throughout this competition. It's been a truly humbling experience and this is an article that means more to me than any other. Thank you.


Writer's Note: In the wake of Jill's passing, Jill's friends at BCIT(where she graduated just before her passing) set up an amazing charity called "Go Jill Go". Jill was a proponent of always living your dreams, so her friends set up a challenge where you choose one thing you've always dreamt about doing but we're too afraid to do(sky-dive, put on a benefit concert, cook a family dinner for 20, ANYTHING!), and you collect pledges to do it. Then during Dream Week in February, you make the dream reality! Check it out at http://www.gojillgochallenge.com to learn more about the challenge and about Jill. Thanks.